第１６話　決めてやる！今夜 　原題：But Seriously Folks

青色の文は、後で訂正した箇所です。(8/27)

冒頭より、

Je: Alright, now let's try the A minor seventh chord which is the first finger.
    OK, first... relax, relax. First fret for third string,
    there you go. This finger goes there, that finger...
DJ: I almost have it. If I only had one more finger.
Je: Alright, give it a try. Let's hear.
    That was very good, that was very close to music.
Ki: Not close enough.
DJ: Kimmy I swear. I'm gonna learn how to play this thing.
    Now don't forget starting the Bracelets was my idea.
Ki: That's why I would be so tragic to have to replace you.
Je: Kimmy, do me a favor. Don't help.
    Alright, let's, uh, let's do the song, Venus, alright.
    Let's do the tune, OK? You start it. Go ahead. DJ, go ahead.
DJ: GYUH~~~HHNG!
Je: Good. That's good. That's that's very good.

Je: Sing it, kid.
Ki: Goddess on a mountain top.
Je: Oh, lay it down, child.
Ki: Burning like a silver flame
Je: Burn it down to the ground.
Ki: Summit of beauty and love
Je: Love.
Ki: And Venus was her name.
DJ: Ow! She's got it, yeah, baby she's got it.
    This side is so much easier to play. Uh, let me try again.
Je: Alright.
Da: That was beautiful. Look, I'm sorry to cut this short.
    But tonight is Joey's big night. Let's go.


Jo: Alright, Danny, listen to this. I got a new bit.
    Hello, Robert. I'm gonna visit all my friends in prison.
Da: Mr. Ed?
Jo: Close. Mr. Ed Meese.
Da: Joey, you are gonna be hot tonight.
Jo: It's finally gonna happen. Danny, I can feel it.
    Tonight is my night.
    Did I tell you there's gonna be a talent scout there from ..
Da: From HBO who's looking for talented young comics for a big special.
    Yeah, you might have mentioned it once or twice or
    several hundred thousand times.
Je: We got the kid. We packed up.
    She'll either spend a night over grandma's or six months in Europe.
Da: Thank you.
Jo: I'm sorry you're gonna miss this, Michelle.
    Okay, give me a kiss for good luck.
Je: All right. It always kills me but I think I'll be supportive for a moment.
    Joseph. You're a real funny guy.
    And you're gonna do great tonight. Time's up.
Jo: Well, thanks. I'll be touched for a moment. Time's up.
    Alright. Wish me luck, everybody.
Ev: Good luck.
Jo: Tonight is my night. Yes!
DJ: We'd better get going, too.
Je: No no no.. We can't go yet.
    My date hasn't showed up yet. I'm so nervous.
St: Good evening, Jess.
Je: Hello, dear.
St: Sorry, I kept you waiting.
Je: May I say you look quite lovely this evening.
St: And may I say you look quite lovely yourself, too, also.
Je: Here you are.
DJ: What are you lugging around a purse for?
St: Because I have woman things I need on a date.
    Money for a phone call. Keys to some place.
    And of course an orange. Shall we.
Je: Let's.
St: Thank you.
Je: Thank you.
St: Thank you.
Je: Uh, thank you.
St: Thank you.
Da: They do make a lovely couple. I'll get the Pandie.

４分１０秒後、
ステージに失敗した翌朝。

Da: Joey, you're down here?
Jo: I'm here.
Da: We were worried. We didn't come hear you come in last night.
Jo: Good morning all.
DJ: Is that you inside that suit?
Jo: Indeed it is.
Je: He's been moussing.
Da: Joey, you've never moussed.
Jo: Please, call me Joe. It's more sophisticated, more grown uppie.
Je: Uh.. Excuse me, .. Joe. Is there a punch line to this?
Jo: Oh, there's no punch line.
    You see, last night was a revelation that big break is not coming.
    I am going to venture into the business world.
    I'm going to get a real job, and make some real money.
    I'm starting a whole new way of life.
DJ: What about your comedy?
Jo: DJ, there comes a point in your life
    where you just have to say yourself, "I tried, and I failed."
    I'm just glad I found this out now, and not when I'm forty-six years old.
    I am quitting comedy.
Je: Lea Iacocca? 
Jo: My man. 


Je: Oh, I'm glad I took off for today, otherwise I would've missed
    a fascinating tour of every day-care center in the northern bay area.
Da: I know, but once Joey finds a job, we're gonna lose a baby sitter.
    We've got to find a great place for Michelle.
Je: We've narrowed it down to your favorite, eight hundred and three. Here.
Da: OK, let's switch. Here you go. 
Je: Come here, Michelle.
Da: OK, I like this place.
    "Piggly-Wiggly Fitness and Day-care Center" specializing in toddlerobics.
     Oh, look at this, a complementary sweatband.
     Let's see how she likes that. I'm playing some music.
Je: Here you go, Michelle. Just try on the sweatband.
    Oh, Arnold Schwarzen baby. OK, here you go, Michelle.
Da: Work it around, work it out!
JD: And go, leg up. Now go....
Je: Obviously you feel pretty secure about those chubby little legs of yours.
Da: Why don't we just go with the center with the nicest people?
Je: Good thinking.
Da: OK.
Je: Come here.
Jo: Good afternoon, gentlemen.
Je: Good afternoon, Joe. How did it go today?
Jo: Two more job offers. Bank teller and stock broker trainee. 
Da: Great! Which one are you gonna take?
Jo: Neither. The bank job, the bank was way up on this big hill,
    I've got to go all the way up the hill, back down the hill. Not my style.
    Stock broker job, They served me instant coffee. Enough said?
Da: Excuse me, Mr businessman, but do you realize you've been offered
    eight jobs, and you found something wrong with all eight of them?
Jo: Hey, I know what I'm doing. I don't want to rush into anything.
    I'm not gonna make the same mistake I did when I got into comedy.
St: Hi, Daddy. Hi, Uncle Jesse. Hello, Joe.
Jo: Hello, Stephanie.
St: Wanna go watch Rocky and Bullwinkle?
Jo: Ha, ha ha ha. No cartoons for me, Steph.
    I am going to read the Wall Street Journal.
    Cartoons? I'm a business man. Ha ha..
St: I miss the old Joey.
Da: So do I. He's not happy about giving up comedy.
    That's why he keeps turning down all those jobs.
    Joey's really starting to worry me.
Je: Joey's always worryied me.

５分４０秒後、
再びステージにあがった後。

Jo: Thanks for all your help, guys.
Je: All right.
Da: Yeah, that's where you belong, up on stage bringing joy to total strangers.
Jo: Yeah, you're right. I just get so tired waiting for that big break
    and the paychecks that goes with it.
Je: Take one of those jobs. Why do you think I work as an exterminator?
    Like I play rock 'n' roll music to support my bug-killing habit?
Jo: You're right, Jess. I'm gonna find something that I can do at home.
    That way I can still watch the girls, make a few bucks, 
    and still do my act at night. Oh tonight.. oh, tonight was my night.
    Everything worked out great, and we all lived happily ever after.
    Ha ha.. Thank you and good night, guys.
Je: Whoa,... hold it, hold it. Whoa. Not so fast.
Jo: You wanna hug, don't you?
Je: Not unless I'm choking on a chicken bone.
    Now, it seems we have a problem with one of my little nieces.
Jo: We do?
Da: Jesse told me, when you quit comedy, DJ quit playing the guitar.
Jo: She did?
Je: Apparently.., the kid looks up to you for some strange reason.
Jo: She does?
Da: And you know what to do about it.
Jo: I do?
JD: You DO.
Jo: I do.
Je: You see, he did, didn't he?

目次へ戻る　ひとつ前へ戻る