第１１話 ジョーイの笑って許して 原題：Joey's Place
冒頭より。
Jo: Poooo... (Joey's performance)
St: Is this normal?
DJ: It is for Joey.
Jo: Girls, wait till you hear what happened to me today.
It's amazing. It's incredible. It's unbelievable.
DJ: What happened?
St: Yeah, tell us right now.
Jo: Can't tell you.
DJ: I hate it when he does that.
Jo: I'll tell you just as soon as everyone gets home.
Je: Oh, Boy, what a day!
Come here, you girls, give your uncle J a kiss. Very nice.
Listen, girls, I know how much you look up to me.
But no matter how glamourous you think my life is,
Don't ever kill bugs for a living.
SD: Nnnnn..
３分後、リハーサルをやっているジョーイのところに、みつばちステフがやってきます。
Jo: Steph, what are you doing?
St: I'm practicing for my next honeybee meeting.
Jo: It's very nice, but I'm trying to rehearse.
St: Go ahead. It won't bother me.
Jo: Hey, Jess. I'm looking for a place to rehearse.
Je: Good luck.
DJ: Uncle Jesse, I'm trying to do my homework.
Je: Sorry. I bet that Chuck Berry didn't have to live with three nieces.
Jo: Michelle. Ha, Michelle, are you busy?
Mi: Pa pa da da.
!!: Pa pa da da.
Jo: Sorry, I didn't know you had company.
!!: Sorry, I didn't know you had company.
Jo: Cut it out. You people are too.. Quit it! Get out of here.
And now ladies and gentlemen, a dramatic presentation.
A little something I'd like to call 'Ode to a fountain'.
Jo: Tada!
DJ: Joey, that looks so real.
Every time I see you do your fountain act,
I wanna throw pennies on your face and make a wish.
Jo: Just wish that I do that well on the tour.
DJ: Oh you'll be great.
I finished my homework so you can rehearse in my room.
But please don't spit on my bed.
Jo: Oh, DJ. It's OK. The garage really isn't that bad.
DJ: It's freezing.
Jo: Your wrap, madame?
DJ: Merci beaucoup.
Jo: Oh. Ooh la la.
DJ: I didn't know you kept your clothes in your car.
Jo: Well, that alcove is so small.
But my trunk makes a good closet.
The worst part, DJ, is not having any privacy.
DJ: I know what you mean.
I live with a five-year old who thinks that I was
born so that she'd have someone to play with.
Not that I'm complaining.
Jo: Oh, of course not. DJ, in my pre-alcove days, I lived like a king.
I had my own door, four walls, and a light switch.
It was Camelot. Not that I'm complaining.
DJ: Well, in my pre-Stephanie days, my Bananarama poster
didn't have to share the wall with rainbow bright.
JD: Not that I'm complaining.
DJ: Well, if you need a place to keep your socks.
My bike basket is all yours.
Jo: Thanks, DJ, but I keep my socks in the glove compartment.
If you really wanna do me a favor, you can get me another glass of water
so I can finish washing the rest of the car.
DJ: And it was just so sad.
I mean there was Joey alone in the cold garage,
spitting water into the air for nobody.
Da: That is sad.
Je: It could've been worse. We could've had to watch it, right Michelle?
DJ: Dad, Joey has no place to rehearse.
Isn't there something we can all do to help him?
Da; What Joey really needs is his own room.
Je: Yes, you're right. Joey needs a room, O.K.
Let's stop and think about this.
Durn... no rooms, Oh, well, we thought about it.
I'm kidding. I'm joking. See, she knows I'm joking.
St: Daddy.
Da: What?
St: Joey is not here yet.
Je: Time out, Stephanie.
Honey, let's have a little talk about this lookout thing.
The key is to let us know when Joey is coming,
not when Joey is not coming.
St: This is harder than I thought.
Da: No, sweetie, it's easy, all you have to do is when you see Joey coming,
you give us the secret code, uh... "The duck flies at midnight."
St: "Duck flies at midnight". I should get paid for this.
DJ: O.K, I got this all figured out.
Now, if I move into Michelle's room, Joey moves into my room,
Michelle moves into the alcove,
and Stephanie gets her very own tent in the back yard.
St: I don't think so.
DJ: OK, plan B. If we put bunk beds in Jesse's room,
that means Uncle Jesse and Joey could be roommates. Great idea, huh?
Je: I don't think so.
５分３０秒後、ジェシーの様子がおかしくなるところ。(^^;
DJ: I miss Joey already.
St: Yeah, me too.
Je: Ah, like I miss him. Ya ta ta ta ta….
St: Uncle Jesse, maybe, we should eat without daddy.
Sometimes he comes home real late.
Je: A family should always eat together,
now, we'll give your father five more minutes, O.K?
DJ: Could we start on some vegetables? Did I say vegetables?
I must be starving.
Da: Hi, honey, I'm home. Hi, girls.
DS: Hi, dad.
Da: I'm sorry I'm late. At the last minute, I had to rush out to
Oakland to cover a Warriors' practice session,
traffic was miserable...
Je: Give me a break.
Da: Huh?
Je: Don't "Huh?" me.
Your waltzed in here twenty five minutes' late and expect sympathy?
Da: Oh, I didn't know you...
Je: I have cleaned the house, and washed and ironed your clothes,
and ran a day-care center for socially deviate munchkins, and missed Opera,
ran this one to a ballet lesson, this one to the dentist,
no cavities, thank you very much.
Do you realize that I have slaved over a hot stove
so you can have a hot meal when you come home? Hum, hum?
Da: Jesse, I'm sorry.
Je: Sorry? Huh, Sorry.. Sorry doesn't change the fact that my
chicken Tetrazzini is ruined. Ruined. It's all dried out.
But, do you have the common courtesy to call me and tell me
you were going to be twenty five minutes late, No!
I am not an animal. Oh, my god! What's happening to me?
I'm turning into June Cleaver.
Da: Oh.. you are a beautiful human being.
Jesse, the first day is always the toughest.
Je: No.
Da: Hey, my sad little soldier, this will perk you up.
I figured out the perfect solution to Joey's alcove problem.
I talked to some contractors, and during next two weeks,
we are going to build Joey his own bedroom.
DJ: Good idea.
Je: Oh, great, another room for me to clean?
DJ: Uncle Jesse, your chicken's pretty good.
St: Yeah, it's just a little dry.
Jo: I'm back.
St: The duck flies at midnight. I got it.
Da: O.K. Everybody, be cool. Don't say a thing.
Je: O.K. Who's turn. What have you got there?
Da: Okay, I'd like to buy Indiana.
Je: All right, five hundred dollars.
Da: O.K. Don't forget the change.
Je: Whose turn is it?
Jo: Oh.. Hello.
Je: Hi, Joey.
St: Hi, Joey.
Da: Hi, Joey.
Je: Uh.. Whose turn is it?
Da: How did the collage tour go?
Jo: Fine, real good. How did everything go here?
Je: Oh! We're cool. House is cool. Kids are cool.
Listen, Peking duck in the fridge for you.
Jo: Just out of curiosity, would anybody happen to know
where all my stuff is?
Da: Yeah, we moved it down to the garage. ... Alright.
Jo: Oh, I see.
Da: I think it's your turn.
Jo: Well, Uh.. Maybe, there is something else you'd like to tell me
like, uh.. "Good bye."
Da: Joey.
Jo: "Adios.", "Amscray."
DJ: Joey.
Jo: "Hit the road, Joey?"
Je: Joey, your stuff is in the garage. Go, check it out.
Jo: I'll check it out, and then I'll pack it up.
You just threw my stuff down in the garage?
Why didn't you just fling it out on the front lawn?
Am I still getting my mail here?
Or, did you forward it to the gutter.
I didn't demand to move in here. I volunteered to help out.
If you didn't need my help, all you had to say was... "Joey is an idiot."
Oh.. I got a bathroom, my jets, mannie, my bed. I love it.
Da: You deserve it.
Jo: How did you guys get my old furniture?
Da: Your mom.
Jo: What happened to all the junks that was down here?(?)
DJ: Attic.
Jo: Where is your motorcycle.
Je: Back yard.
Jo: Hey, where are we gonna park our cars?
St: Street.
Jo: This was the garage? Danny, this must've cost a fortune.
Da: Don't ask. Joey, you are my best friend.
And you're doing me the biggest favor of my life
by helping me raise my girls.
This is just our way of saying thanks.
Jo: No one has ever done anything like this for me before.
And the best part is as great as my new room here is,
you guys really want me here.
Da: Are you kidding? You're part of our family.
Face it, pal, you are Tanner.
Je: Welcome home, Joseph. Tomorrow, you're on the dayshift.
DJ: Steph, I got great news, this means you could move into the alcove.
St: You are too good to me, it's all yours.
Jo: Thanks for the room, everybody.
Da: Farward your mail to the gutter, huh?
Je: Fling your stuff on the lawn, huh?
Jo: I was kidding, I'm a comedian, I'm in the kidding business.
Je: Kid this.
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